Wiccan forced to go to church by father in law?

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I am a 28 year old solitary Wiccan. My father and law wants to purchase a house close to his for us to rent for the sole purpose of keeping his daughter close to home. He has told me that he will get the house but I have to start going to church. His daughter knows that I am not a church person but I do not discuss my beliefs with her parents because of their strong Christian beliefs. I know that they have no right to make such a demand but how should I approach the situation?

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Joe Random

If you are paying rent then take him to court if he doesn’t let you live there- a landlord cannot discriminate on the basis of religion, age, sex, national origin, or race so he would lose the court case.
Or just be a man and get your own place with your wife.

Just Plain Bob

Very simple. don’t rent a house from him.

Future Dominican

You can refuse the house and not go to church or take the house and go to church, his house, his rules.

Nightwind: Mwa ha ha!

It’s his rental property. He can pretty much make whatever requirements he wants for it. (You might be able to sue of discrimination, but seriously, that’s pretty much a marriage ender.) If he insists you have to go to church if you rent, don’t rent from him.
If he makes a fuss about you not renting from him, be polite but firm: you do not find his terms for the lease reasonable.
You are a 28 year old person. Your religion is your business, not his. The fact that he wants to keep his daughter close and dictate your religious behavior indicates a highly controlling figure.


Tell them calmly that you’d appreciate it if they respected your beliefs, and say that you aren’t going with them.
Or you could just not move into the house they got for you.

Anonnie Mouse

Turn him down. If he has a problem, well, that’s his problem. You are an adult, so you get to make your own decisions about these things.

Brad B, Three Timer

That sort of thing is just one reason why I wouldn’t date someone with religious views too different. Sorry. Got no advice.

TuTu Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ

Christians believe that the practice of Wicca (witchcraft) is a branch in Satanism.
You’re a 28 year old man tell him the truth BEFORE you move.

Butch Vlad - Heathen JPA

Tell him your spirituality isn’t up for ransom. Tell him that is off the table.
Why agree to rent a house that he’s paying for? Is your rent going to be a rent-to-own thing? Even if it is, would it be worth handing over your religious freedom to his demands? What next? Is he going to demand that you get baptized in the church of their choosing?
What happens when u have kids? Do U seriously think they aren’t going to make a lot of demands then?
man up and say No – U can rent a home without the demands somewhere else

Autumnfire G

No one can force you, they can pressure you, but you can say no. If you will be unhappy, then rent another home for now til you can afford to buy one of your own


Don’t think of it as him forcing YOU to go to church…think of it as being respectful to your wife/girlfriend’s beliefs and those of his family. I am not Christian by no means any longer, but I attend church regularly with my family, out of respect for my husband’s religion. I would hope that he would do the same for me if I attended services geared towards my beliefs. It would perhaps do you good to stop thinking only of yourself and your beliefs and start respecting someone elses.
ETA: I see by the thumbsdown people would rather remain selfish and disrespectful than think of someone else for a change. Forshame.

super bad tim to the rescue!

have you never seen ‘everybody loves raymond’?
church is nothing. do you want fundies coming into your house every day?
what does your wife think? if she’s so dependent on her parents, maybe you made a mistake. these people will be influencing your children — every. frakking. day.
my best friend’s mother-in-law only had her son for babysitting while she was at work and very nearly succeeded at turning him into a junior fundie. this is your future. even if you get him to back down on the church thing, you’re going to have them constantly breathing down your neck.
tell your wife you want the two of you to have your own space to raise your children as the two of you see fit. tell her in no uncertain terms that you will not agree to attend church as a condition of a lease. if she won’t defend you, she’s not the wife for you. sorry, but if these people are that religious, why didn’t you make it clear in the beginning that you don’t share their beliefs?
ma’i, i have news for you. fundies do not attend the religious services of their family members with different beliefs, with the possible exception of jewish. it’s fine for you if you consider it respectful, but in this case there’s a clear disrespect on behalf of the FIL. i personally will not attend a fundie service for any reason. i attend family funerals unless i know the church is hateful, but i did not attend my niece’s baptism because it was done at a church that condemns homosexuality. there’s such a thing as self-respect, too, and that includes not supporting institutions that demonize me and my beliefs. tolerance is a fine thing, but it needs to work both ways; i’m glad you seem to have found a tolerant church, but don’t condemn those of us with bad experiences, or automatcially assume we’re being disrespectful.


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