Why do people spend so much time and energy focusing on their wedding ceremony and so little time?

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Focusing on whether or not the person they are about to many is a suitable partner? People seem to get “brain washed” with the idea of having a perfect wedding and whether their relationship has the potential to stand the tests of time seems to become a trivial, insignificant issue to address before the wedding. Why is that?

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Mum of 2.5, Induced in 4 days

What are you basing this on?
I got married July last year and I was certain then and still am now that my husband is perfect for me. I had no nerves before the wedding, no cold feet because I knew that without a doubt he was the man I wanted to spend my life with. The only fears I did have were the idea I would mess up my vows in front of everyone and be really embarrassed. (I didn’t in the end).
I don’t think everyone is as bad as you think and the people that are will realise later down the line the mistake they have made and hopefully they will learn from this.

darth.marcus

Thats the way the world is, its all about “keep up with the jones”. Having the best photos that sho the day as completly opposite to how everyone actually felt. Some weddings ive been to, getting photos are the worst. Everyone is getting cranky, trying to get people where they want them etc, then “smile” Photo looks great but teh day was fuking bedlam. Sorry, I’m rambling. Image is everything with people these days. You just have to look at someones Facebook page. Some people On facebook ive known for years, but when I check out their page, its like they’re a different person! Hey, gotta stick it to the ex from high school though. People have got to stop spending money they dont have on shit they dont need.

Suzianne

Weddings have become big business.
Frankly, I think most weddings are horrible. They reflect the worst of taste and amount to wretched excess. There have been some exceptions, but not many.

Kevin7

i agree, people are foolish

Lona

Because when two people are in love they are certain of things about themselves and their true love that has never been tested and won’t until the years start to pass by and real life begins to happen. It’s a process that is unknown at the first.
These are usually young people and have no idea what to look out for. They have no point of reference.

puppy love rules

Some like mum of 2.5 get it right, but I also have seen a lot of people more interested in an expensive wedding to brag about than compatibility or even seeing eye to eye with the person they plan to wed. I have even heard a girl bad mouthing her betrothed to her girlfriends just before the wedding – great start, NOT!

rosebud

I’ve known several young couples in the past few years who have borrowed tens of thousands of dollars for big fancy weddings, not thinking about what stress that debt will put on their new marriage. Their weddings cost more than they would make during the first year of their marriage. Some of them have had to delay home ownership to pay off their wedding loans.

re-pixed

It’s a show!!!
My wife and I spent much more time on planning and working on our lives together.
It’s been 43 years and so far it has worked out.

Laurie

The old saying, love is blind stands true. I wish more people would put the effort into their marriage as much as they put into the details of a wedding.

MishMash

Not everyone is like You say. Actually I don’t know anyone as shallow as that.

jonds

My ceremony was about three minutes in front of the judge between court cases and that was almost thirty years ago.

Patti

If they are spending so much time creating the “perfect” wedding perhaps it’s for show and not just a joyous celebration. I knew someone who did this and the relationship fell apart before the wedding. She talked endlessly about the things she was buying for her house, the wedding, this and that and very few words about the groom and the relationship.

Kembek

Great question! I believe a lot of brides/couples are more interested in the ceremony and reception than the importantance of the event. Most brides want to be a “princess” for a day.

DR W

Weddings vs marriage…appearance vs substance.

seamstress

I believe you are either slightly misinformed or you know someone like the person you described. In any event, what you say is not usually or even mostly the case.
If I read between the lines, you may be wondering why so much time and energy and money is spent on the wedding plans and how some brides become absolutely obsessed with their wedding and live it and breathe it 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. Although that may be true, it does not mean they are doing it INSTEAD of concentrating on their relationship. Because at the wedding planning stage a man and woman already realize and have a future plan of action. The wedding is the first step to get them there. Silly.

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