I think I’m about to die, either by my own hand or some others. I have also been coming to conclusions about all these spiritual matters.ANy body close to dying and having all kinds of weird revelations and coincidental things leading you to believe in eternal life and karma and if we don’t do good we are damned? It is making want to be a monk, but I can hardly stand giving up on finding love with a woman. It is the only thing tearing me apart. Not possesions or anything else. I don’t know , but weird stuff has been happening.