Home Discussion Forum Loss of religion equally to loss of a sense of self?

Loss of religion equally to loss of a sense of self?

I was raised Mormon and I always loved being religious and spiritual. I prayed every day, I believed that I could handle anything in life becasue God would never give me more than I could handle. I always had such a sense of self-worth and I always felt strong.
After going to college and taking history, philosophy and science classes, religion didn’t look to be so true after all. It’s quite mind awakening to realize how big the world has always been and how each person seems to be not so significant.
Anyway, I miss the way that I use to feel. Religion=safety, security, belonging. Now I feel like I’m missing something, and while I probably won’t return to religion, I need some avenue to help me get back my sense of purpose.
I’d say it’s been a good 10 yrs since I denounced religion. Even though it’s not real I’m not convinced that it’s important to know this. They say that knowledge is good but is it better to live in peace of mind by a falsehood or face the startling reality that no God has your back and you are protected.


  1. Try a different religion. Go & visit different church denominations. See what you find. Maybe God has another plan in mind for you.

  2. I’d say you actually found yourself.
    Now, you’re free to think for yourself, instead of clinging to Bronze Age fairy tales.

  3. I think its common to feel that way in any life transition. I felt a bit like a fish out of water my first few weeks away from home at college. Part of me really wished that I could go back home to my familar setting and routines and people. Change and transition can always have a scary component even when they are essentially important and positive steps in personal growth and development. Its not that you are losing self but redefining, growing, and discovering. Some people handle it better or worse then others. I can remember when I first stopped believing the religion I grew up with I felt that I needed to find something to replace it and went through a seeking period. In the process I just got to where I was really comfortable with the worldview that developed that really had no literal religious subscription but it was a journey. So it may be with you. I think finding meaning in life is a really personal thing. I don’t think to me religion ever really answered that question now. I don’t think there may be a preprogrammed inherent meaning but what is special about being human is that you can create and find as much meaning and purpose in your life as you wish. I have a different view I think of what it is to have meaning and purpose now then I did before. In the end for me its been a positive journey overall. I don’t feel I’m missing something for not subscribing to a false worldview myself but as I said people vary. For me it was a journey of self discovery rather then loss of self.

  4. Studying other peoples belief and interpretation will only be something you need to rule out to get back to your own center of your self. Let your own self and your own beliefs and spirituality have a chance to grow and develop first before taking in too much from studies. You must take care in what you might leave yourself open to by making sure that it is something supportive of your realm of understanding. Try to reacquaint yourself with your church and don’t give up without giving your church a chance.

  5. “The Universe, as has been observed before, is an unsettling big place. The fact which, for the sake of a quiet life, most people tend to ignore. Many would happily move to somewhere rather smaller of their own devising, and this is what most beings, in fact, do.”
    (Douglas Adams, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy.)
    Having a small comprehensible map with “you are here” marked clearly somewhere near the centre is comforting.
    And simplified and provisional maps *can* be handy, as long as you remember what they are.
    I wouldn’t presume to set your compass for you.
    (I’ve spent considerable time wandering).
    But I would firmly recommend Douglas Adams on The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy, The Restaurant at the End of the Universe and Life the Universe and Everything.
    He packs a lot of telling observation and philosophy in with the humour.

  6. True religion, is that which even when you are alone, you do not feel lonely. When people abandon you, you do not feel abandoned. When people mistreat you, yo do not become hateful. When they betray you, you do not become vengeful. When you are not among your community, you do not feel a stranger. True religion, helps you to tap within you, from the well of the spirit, who is eternal. If you feel lost when you are away from your church, examine your spirituality. There is something fundamental that is lacking, besides being away from your church community.

  7. I’m not sure you actually had a relationship with Christ. Did you receive the overwhelming love of the Holy Spirit? When you talked to God everyday in prayer did you feel his love? If you felt his Presence I’m sure you could not doubt him now, I cannot doubt him, he fills me with his love and conviction and truth and I cannot deny him! I have studied Physics, Law, Languages etc., reading a book or two a week on diverse subject matter. I don’t deny God because of it. Religion should not mean the safety of belonging to a family or group—–that is secular………but a close, close relationship with GOD. I am not saying any of this to be judgmental, but because I feel you are truly seeking to take a look backwards and then forwards. ( I’m amazed that you are so quickly leaving Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel; which is really not another; only there are some who are disturbing you, and want to distort the gospel of Christ. But even though we, or an angel from heaven, should preach to you a gospel contrary to that which we have preached to you, let him be accursed.” Gal 1:6-8) The Word of God clearly teaches that salvation is by simple heart’s faith in the Lord Jesus Christ (Romans 10:10). Titus 3:5 reads, “Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to his mercy he saved us, by the washing of regeneration, and renewing of the Holy Ghost.” Some Mormon teachings I’m afraid are contradictory to the Bible. Why not take the time to study the word of God in the Bible (asking for the Jesus help in revealing the meaning)? I hope I have not offended you, Peace out

  8. Your story reminds me of Lehi’s dream. There is a tree whose fruit is most desirable above all other fruit. Next to it is a large and spacious building filled with people in the habit of pointing at those who eat of the fruit, and mocking them. Ashamed, they walk away from the tree and are lost.
    The fruit is the love of God. The great and spacious building is the world. You let yourself become ashamed because “smart” people pointed at you and laughed.


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