Home Discussion Forum I really hate my boyfriend's mom?

I really hate my boyfriend's mom?

I can’t stand her. Whenever he takes me over to his parents house it boils my blood. I get along with his dad just fine but his mom is so annoying. Like when I go there, she always has to make me cook to help her. If she invited us to dinner then shouldn’t she cook without my help? She also comments on my dresses and even told me a few times that I should wear something more appropriate. What a old, uptight hag. She also makes sure my boyfriend and I don’t even touch each other when at her house. I once gave him a little kiss and she got mad and told me not to do it again. I hate being humiliated and bossed around by her. I really love my boyfriend and told him to stop being in touch with her and refuse to go to her house but he won’t completely do it. What do I do?

14 COMMENTS

  1. Grow up and suck it up. This woman has been the most important person in his life for his whole life. He loves her very very very much. You don’t have to like her, but if you love your boyfriend then you will find your manners, and bow to her wishes. Don’t make him choose, you will lose. Help her cook, wear granny clothes, and don’t touch him for the one afternoon a week/month that you are there. It will be well worth it in the long run.

  2. LOL, You should get used to being around WOMEN. She acts like a grown woman, get used to it. She doesn’t sound all that bad, you may just need to grow up.

  3. Wow-o-wow you found another few people who don’t think the world revolves around you. Since they probably have good common sense, perhaps you should look elsewhere for a BF that you can manipulate and control. You sound like one person which no mama is gonna like, baby, you be wanting her son to drop her, for you? FAT CHANCE. Move on.

  4. You can’t just tell your boyfriend to stop talking to his mother. If someone told you to stop talking to your mom and cut off ties, I don’t think you would. It’s also kinda disrespectful to your boyfriend that you’re telling him that.
    His mom is probably like that because she’s old fashioned and also has high standards for what kinda woman she wants her son to marry. My mom’s cousin is in her 60’s and she’s never been married before and still lives with her mother all cuz her mom wouldn’t allow her to get married to anyone other than someone who has a high status (money and career wise). No one was good enough for her daughter, so she basically ruined her life.
    She shouldn’t make you cook but like with my mom she feels that it’s nice if you would at least offer help out even if she doesn’t need help. She’d rather have someone ask to help and she say no thank you than for someone to not offer at all. Like with my mom, if you’re a guest she won’t expect you to help out in the kitchen but if you’re family (including married into the family) she thinks you should offer to help. Maybe your bf’s mom thinks the same way and she sees you like a wife to your bf.
    What do you wear when you go over there? Try not to show too much cleavage and don’t wear really short skirts and you should be fine. My mom is old fashioned and she’ll tell my friend the same thing about her clothes.
    You just have to show her that you’re a good person and eventually she’ll be nicer to you and accept you. From now on, just be nice and offer to help her in the kitchen instead of her forcing you to. My mom is hard to please as well but with my last bf I warned him about her and he tried really hard and my mom ended up liking him a lot. We would never kiss in front of her and he’d always make sure I was ok, so my mom had a great respect for him.
    By the way, it’s so important to get along with your bf’s family because if you don’t and you end up marrying him, that’s jsut even more trouble. You don’t want it to end the relationship.

  5. I don’t think you are at fault like Old Mister Happy suggested. I also have a “challenging” mother-in-law. When we told her we were engaged she said she already knew because she opened my husbands mail that contained the valuation for the ring. I think that if you love your boyfriend enough you need to befriend his mother for his sake or you will ruin your relationship. I have almost always been nice to my mother in law even when she did some crazy things to break us up. You have to decide which is more important…fighting with her or having a good relationship with your boyfriend? Sometimes you need to make sacrifices for those you love. Now my mother-in-law likes me and I get on with her for the sake of family peace.

  6. Oh, try looking at it a different way. She wants your help in the kitchen – to get to know you better, to maybe get closer to you, to make the relationship better between the two of you and you only see it as an insult instead of a compliment and an opportunity. From the time I was 14 to 19 – I helped my boyfriend’s step-mom in the kitchen.
    Most people give advice, hints regarding dressing appropriately, not out of trying to be critical or putting you down, but because they really want to help and they really believe they are being helpful.
    She has rules about physical contact, sorry, it’s her house, her rules. It won’t kill you.
    If you make your boyfriend choose between you and his family, you will lose.

  7. yea i can say my soon to be mother is way worse! im not alowed in her house past ten. and she yealls at my soon to be husban constintly about me and makes me cry. i hate her for they way ahe tlks to me and screams all the time i cant even stand outside her house and hug my fenince without her sayin something rude and we ahev been together three yers and are haveing a child.shes always buttin in on iur realiship and telling me at 8 n a half months preg tht im lazy n need to get a job. comes over to my house and yells cuz there is two cups in the sink! yes she is way worse i wish she acted like ur bfs mom

  8. I see how annoying that could be, my boy friend’s mother try to tell us what to do for our weekend. She dont really ask if we want to do certain thing, she just kind of order and tell us. for example, she would email us and muitiple call to tell us to go this show and then have dinner at her house. every weekends, in the early morning she would call my boy friend to tell him what to do for “fun” for the day. I really appreciate her for the thoughts but all the time? come on, can we plan for our own weekend? she would sometimes get tickets (of course free tickets) to certain shows without asking us ahead.
    once she said she bought this ticket for us and she cant return. that was on our anniversary day he booked seat in a nice restaurant. He told her that it our send year anniversary and we had plans. she said how great this show is and how hard to see something like that again. So, we felt bad for her paying for tickets and wasting it so we canceled our dinner. later we learnt from her and other people that the tickets r free and not even enough people came to the show.
    what is that? blunt lies and tricks to prevent us spending time just us on our anniversary? she secretly plan to sabotage with lie and tricks, how do I respond? anger? fight her? my blood boils even when as I tell this story. for god sake why did she have to do that on that day?

  9. I don’t kno y my bf mom acts she likes me , and I truly think she doesn’t . I have been with him over 2 years not once she has given me a nice complement. I don’t feel like I’m being myself around her. She is over 48 n she acts like she is a queen or something. I am in medical field n I model. Hier son was I cleaned him n she knows that. It’s fine no one has to appreciate it n I can just ignore that part that she doesn’t complement me. But I don’t have the heart to act all happy around her. She makes me feel so mean n not myself whenever I’m around her, plz help me and give me your advice. Thank u

  10. I’ve been through worse. My boyfriend’s mom really really really hates me. She insulted my family. She insulted me. She even told my boyfriend to break up with me!!! I really can’t stand her. And I’m telling you that you’re lucky she’s just like that. Mine is total b*******

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