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Husband’s total loss of sex drive due to spiritual reasons?

I met my husband a year ago and we had premarital sex a lot. He is very religious and had a prob. with it, but we did it anyway. Now that we’re married (under 6 mos) he says he has totally lost his sex drive. He said he is struggling with the fact that we “sinned” before our wedding (even tho both of us have been married before), and although he’s asked God to forgive him, he knows that he is forgiven, but is still struggling with it. I have accused him of having an affair or even being a homosexual because I know he did experiment with that before we met. He denies both. Nothing else has changed in our relationship to warrant such a lack of drive for him–we don’t argue and there’s no stress besides this issue. How in the world can i compete with such a “reason” as he’s giving me (spiritual one). He knows i am attracted to him and i stroke his ego often. Help!

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gizzmo220
gizzmo220
10 years ago

I say dump him and come to Connecticut.

misydoll
misydoll
10 years ago

Tell him sex is part of the healthy relationship you hope to have with him. Give him a week or so and then get out.

free_angel
free_angel
10 years ago

Tell him to forigve himself. He’s a married man now and can have all the sex he wants.

RoadRunner
RoadRunner
10 years ago

remind him of who he is married to…YOU not some god whom has not been proven to exist. If he can’t get over it then tell him to have a nice life in a monestary where he can jack off to god all he wants.

Cari F
Cari F
10 years ago

Okay, I am a Christian and I too have had pre-marital sex. I am not proud of that, especially given my spiritual beliefs. I do believe it is a sin. Still, God created the institution of marriage and designed for sex in a marriage to be a beautiful thing. He intended for us to enjoy sex within the confines of marriage. Yes, God calls it sin when we have sex before marriage. When we do sin in that way, I believe that it pleases God when we marry that person so that we are no longer sinning when we are… Read more »

jimmy.parker06
jimmy.parker06
10 years ago

Your husband is full of SH*T. If he was that God fearing why did he have premarital sex, could he not have waited and asked you to do the same. I think your husband is a freak, because he can only get it on if he is fearful, that is he feared God and enjoyed premarital sex, now that he is married there is no fear anymore. Trying getting it on in a public place where there is a fear of getting caught, if he can get it on, then you know. He then probably needs to see a shrink.… Read more »

reece v
reece v
10 years ago

WOW THIS IS A TOUGH ONE, IF HE IS STRUGGLING SO MUCH WITH YOU TWO HAVING PRE-MARITAL SEX MAYBE YOU SHOULD ASK HIM WHAT THE BIBLE SAYS ABOUT MEN BEING WITH MEN AND WOMEN BEING WITH WOMEN.I THINK THAT SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH HIM BUT,I DON’T BELIEVE IT IS YOU.IF HE CAN’T OVERCOME THIS ISSUE PERHAPS YOU SHOULD GET OUT BEFORE YOU WASTE ANYMORE TIME ON THIS ONE.YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY–IF YOU DON’T FEED YOUR DOG AT HOME IT’LL GO SOME WHERE ELSE TO BE FED.GOOD LUCK.

chicchick
chicchick
10 years ago

I smell something funny here…..

His spiritual reasons didn’t stop him from fooling around prior to the marriage. Now all of a sudden he has a problem?? Go fishing for a deeper issue here.

Seti
Seti
10 years ago

He sounds like a nutcase. “Spiritual”… my a**. He’s probably realizing he’s made a mistake marrying you, but is afraid to tell you that. Run, and find yourself a guy who is not a religious fundamentalist.

sweetbabykitty
sweetbabykitty
10 years ago

IF HE’S A JESUS FREAK, GET RID OF HIM. HE’LL GET ALL WEIRD ON YOU. START TELLING YOU YOU NEED TO GO TO CHURCH AND SPEAK IN TONGUE.

gozedown
gozedown
10 years ago

Yeah, like the other guy said…………..your husband is gay !!! The spiritual crap is exactly that, just a bunch of crap. It was fine then but not now ??? Give me a break. You’ve been married for only 6 months, you should STILL be doing it SEVERAL times a day !!! Sounds like another gay man married a girl “on the down low” in order to have a child. I’m sure the signs are there, you just have to look for them……..

John K
John K
10 years ago

One does not “experiment” with homosexuality. There is a problem other than spiritual in my opinion. Another woman? Another man? Turned off by having sex with a woman? You won’t know without talking it through. Use a counselor to help you two communicate on this issue.

stringhead3
stringhead3
10 years ago

Get an annulment unless you want to live in misery for the rest of your married life. Girlfriend there is somebody out there that will jump your bones everyday every hour before and after you are married. Its kind of low of this individual to use religion as an excuse, I never heard of that one.

Blackwidow
Blackwidow
10 years ago

Well for one, if he is so religious, show him in the Bible where it says to render each their due. The husband to the wife, and the wife to the husband. And/or get the Carmen Electra Stripperobics and learn a routine or two and dance for him. Works every time! And while premarital sex is wrong, so is Homosexuality. Again him being so religious, if he is struggling with wondering if God has forgiven him for the premarital sex, he should also feel that way about experimenting with Homosexuality. God destroyed cites over gay and lesbian activities. (Like it… Read more »

pooh
pooh
10 years ago

he’s probaly cheating with another man.

Been there done that
Been there done that
10 years ago

The bible states that it is better to marry than to burn in Hell because of the lack of Self control…..if he was worried about hell then he should have said no then…..Now he is full of crap….like white on rice full of it……

bad b
bad b
10 years ago

he is upset because he is gay! if you experiment with a man he is a fag plain and simple, thats his problem and he cant deal with it

Sofa King Sexy
Sofa King Sexy
10 years ago

He’s full of crap. He’s probably gay.

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