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How would you react to this?

Within my previous basketball club the women and mens teams started hanging out. I was never really invited to outings that the girls organized (which at the time I thought was strange) but I started attending big club functions regardless, where one of the guys (who happened to be desired by those girls) took a liking to me. We started hanging out and soon started dating. It was clear that everyone wanted us to break up, and they got their wish because our relationship couldn’t stand all the negativity, particularly by three of the girls. I was heartbroken. What made matters worse was after we broke up he forgot about me and started hanging out with those girls. I have since found out that he dated all of them. Anyway, I was having a birthday party and I invited two of the less evil girls because they were sometimes nice to me and I didn’t want them to feel left out. I also didn’t know about them dating my ex, and honestly didn’t think they would actually come. However one girl did come to my party, where she told my best friend that she was my ex’s new girlfriend. My friend obviously never told me because I would have been upset but we think it was that girls intention to make me sad on my birthday.
Anyway fast forward and that girl is no longer friends with the other girls and (if you can believe it) played by my ex. Luckily I don’t have to see them often as I left the club but I plan to go to a club function to catch up with my nicer old teamates.
She told a mutual friend that she’s heartbroken and feel like its karma for the way she treated me. Should I feel bad for her because I know what it feels like, and she is questionably feeling guilty? Last time I was nice to her she was sly and tried to upset me. At the same time I definitely know what it’s like to be angry at people. It doesn’t make you feel any better.


  1. No, anger doesn’t make you feel better. It sounds like she’s learned her lesson, and feels truly remorseful for interfering with your relationship and causing its breakup. The guy sounds like a jerk, though, whose intent was just to play everyone.
    You can forgive her and try to forge a friendship with her if that’s what you want, or just let everything go and reflect on the lessons you have learned here.

  2. You will always meet people who are happy when something bad happens to you.
    As hard as it may be, dont relish the fact that she is now suffering.
    Just move on from the situation. You have no obligation to this girl or to your ex boyfriend.
    Your life doesnt revolve around them and so there is no need to act like this is the case.


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