Home Discussion Forum How to get over shyness and self consciousness without therapy?

How to get over shyness and self consciousness without therapy?

I don’t have low self esteem, but it seems awkward when i interact with other people. I know that I shouldn’t worry about what others say and that i am control of my life but it seems hard to let loose and relax. Im only 17 but worries like a single mother. My shyness and inability to open up is not that consistent. It seems that i am confident every other day. Could there be something seriously wrong with me?


  1. I had this problem too, and it’s been easier to manage as I get older. Part of it is practice — the more social interactions you have, the more you’ll realize that horrible things are less common than average or good things!
    It may be helpful to read self-help and psychology books about shyness. Often they include tips and tricks on getting through feelings of awkwardness.

  2. Hi Liza,
    You are only 17 and still learning a lot about yourself as a person. Being self conscious is okay, but it’s better to have self awareness. Awkward interactions with other people can occur if you are not comfortable around them. When I first meet people I am pretty shy myself, but then I open up after a while. People understand that as a lot of people are shy. If you treat others kindly when you meet them they will overlook your shyness. I’d rather be closed at first than open up immediately and risk pushing people the wrong way. I don’t think there is something wrong with you. You just need to meet more people and not think about it too much. Social interactions are fun as long as you don’t make such a big deal of it. It’s all right to let loose and relax if you stay humble and decent to people. An easy thing to do is just to do what others want to do at first, then start suggesting the things that you like to do. People see past the awkward if you just agree or like what they do. When I meet people, I go in with a certain mindset. The next person I meet is the most interesting person in the world. After I learn all about them, they will want to know a bit about me.
    Hope this helps 🙂

  3. I completely agree with the other answers above me, It’s okay and honestly not everyone connects without it being awkward. Practice and meeting all different types of people will help. Don’t blame yourself or think you did something wrong if the other person seems to be less entertained.. it’s more them than it is you.
    Good luck and I’m sure you’re a beautiful bright young lady.

  4. i’m 19 and i’ve had that problem since..well always, i guess. but honestly, i do not think that you being that way is “wrong” or a problem. thats just how you are. of course you shouldn’t get worked up a lot about things..just take it easy. it’s not worth it to get all messed up at this young age. when you feel stressed or are having a hard time to concetrate get in your room (or wherever you feel comfortable) put or favourite music on and relax, and if it makes you feel better dance or scream, whatever. and about having troubles to open up to people – don’t worry about it too much. that’s just how you are. and there will be people who will appreciate that real “you”.
    sorry for the bad english (:


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