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How do i become a shaman, and why do i feel this way?

(Serious answers only please)
First off, I am 17, my mother died a few months ago, and since i have never met my dad i was homeless for awhile and lived with a family member. Recently, that family member’s boyfriend made it obvious he did not like me, and hated me living with them and wanted me out. So i left, and i am now living with a friend. I am suffering financially, my job is cutting my hours severely to the point of 5 hour pay checks for two weeks of work.
While my mother was alive, i was a very spoiled person. I was also an asshole. Since my mother had died, i have gotten into things such as tarot cards, simple tarot spells, and the use of herb’s via teas and pastes. I have given readings to my friends, and made them various things from medicine to teas for relaxing or for good luck.
I am beginning to realize alot of things about reality i never knew before, and im beginning to see things clearly. As in, i can see through the simple, petty problems most people look at and know what the true answer or goal is. I also noticed i am starting to get….angry. I am starting to hate people for things that they do, especially my friends. I am seeing my friends for who they truley are rather than what i want them to be.
( I say nothing, i treat them no different and i don’t mention anything unless asked. It’s not my place to tell them these things. I just have been seeing them and realizing them)
I am very interested in shamanism, not because it is cool, or because im following a blind path. I want to help people, i want to be someone my friends and even strangers consult for help, wether it be advice, tarot readings, medicine, teas, simple spells, knowledge….anything. Most of all, i want the knowledge shamans are able to obtain from the unseen planes that most people are not able to see or communicate with.
Why have i been feeling this way recently, and how can i truely become a shaman?
I don’t get angry at my friends for not being what i want them to be. I get angry at them for doing things that are wrong in general, weather it be something i would do or not. Also, as i stated i don’t tell them or criticize them, because it is not my place to do so. I just get angry internally

5 COMMENTS

  1. From everything I’ve heard, you’re going to have to take a lot of mind-expanding drugs in a lot of remote parts of the world.
    edit: TRUE SHAMAN, people! Anyone can buy some stupid book on how to imitate an author’s meditation process or some even stupider (not a word, but hey, i already had stupid up there and i’m not changing it to dumb) bunch of crystals that cost 0 times as much as they’re actually worth (0). At the heart of it, it’s about SELF-DISCOVERY, and it’s impossible to truly discover the self until one has been removed from it. I’m not saying that doing drugs will miraculously transform you into a shaman, but I think experiences with substances such as the peyote of the Navajo or the ayahuasca of the tribes of the Amazon basin will enhance your meditations exponentially while also doing a hell of a lot for your perspective.
    Do yourself a favor and learn the very important lesson that the human perception of reality, is simply conditioned, and not necessarily REAL.

  2. You are exploring a new path. Often a new path opens up for us through adversity. Look for books in the Metaphysics section of your library. Go to Hippy type crystal shops. Ask if they have classes or seminars, or know who does. A good place to start is guided meditation tapes or CD’s Take a class or join a group. You may connect with someone that is willing to mentor you. One thing that strikes me however, is your statement that you get angry and hate certain friends because they they are not what you want them to be. In an enlightened path, we must respect anothers’ path even if we do not agree with it.

  3. Well it seems to me that you might still be going threw the process of grieving for your mother, and in the process you’ve found your self in away only you can do. You may not be anger at your friends but at her for leaving you. And it’s ok to be mad get pi**ed off and you need to let it out she left you and she wasn’t supposed.
    As for the other stuff! It takes years to learn, it’s not something you just decide to do because you want to. Learn the basics like spell casting and circle’s mediation learn to calm your self when you get angry. Start small and move slow ! I’m not trying to tell you how to go about your life I’m just offering some helpful advice! Dealing with your grief is a good place to start it doesn’t happen over night and it takes time to heal and forgive!!
    Other’s girls advice is also good too! A Mentor is something that could be a good help to you in both ways! And I’m glad that your not an A hole any more!! I truly hope that I’ve helped you in some way!! 🙂

  4. You would be able to benefit greatly from meditation, your city should have free classes offered in several areas, check your community papers or ask at any health food store or metaphysical shop.
    You may also be a good candidate for Reiki, which is a healing form of shamanism (yes, it does cover other traditions as well, and is Asian based, but it’s very good). If you notice your hands getting hot when you work with energy you’re a good candidate. Being taken on as a student would be easier than paying for the courses. Again, check with your phone book for the metaphysical stores and start making connections networking there.
    You need to defuse the anger though, which is why I suggest meditation to get yourself better balanced.

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