I just started running my church a year ago and I can’t believe how cheap these people are. I look in the collection plate every week and there’s nothing in there but pocket change and lint. (Someone even put in a coupon for Shake ‘N Bake.) Don’t these people realize I NEED a new Hummer? My plasma screen tv and Guicci loafers aren’t going to pay for themselves! I asked one of them about this one Sunday and the old hag said ‘You should really worry more about the poor.’ The POOR? I’m THE POOR! I don’t even have a DSL line in the rectory yet! I’m in so much debt right now I might have to start pawning some of the gold candle sticks. Ah, sorry, I had to vent. May the peace of the Lord be with you.