HELP spiritual/emotional/mental chaos because of ex-boyfriend who was Christian?

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My ex told me the day that we broke up that God was leading him to do so. A few months go by and I realize he’s found another female “friend” to latch onto emotionally who he claims is just a “good friend” except, well, she worked her female wiles on him and charmed him away from me while we were still together (he’d talked about her like she was so good and so godly, etc).
I finally emailed him about her, and well, he got a restraining order on me. A no-contact, stalking protection order. Here’s the problem. He knows, in my heart, that I WANT to follow God (as I found out from a conversation he had with someone). BUT, he keeps saying that I’m following HIM in real life, when we went to the same church and now school. We had the same friends.
I can’t pray now without thinking about/feeling about him. I can’t attend church or try to talk to our old friends or his newish friends or attend my/his Christian group without feeling/thinking convicted/bad/guilty. I’ve discovered that women’s and men’s feelings/thinking is completely backwards, and I’ve learned how to not stroke a man’s ego. Anyway I’m just all fucked up and need either a. someone to have sex with or b. someone to set me straight.
Edit – I have moved on, fat bitch.
“Move on” is the worst advice you can give to someone who’s no longer wanted by someone else. You might as well tell the person (me in this case) to shut the fuck up.
If you don’t have any better useful advice to give, or even sympathy, then don’t hang around. Either listen or walk away. Easy peasy.

4 Comments

  1. Let it go. By holding on, you’re only hurting yourself.
    “There is self and there is truth. Where self is, truth is not. Where truth is, self is not. Self is the fleeting error of samsara; it is individual separateness and that egotism which begets envy and hatred. Self is the yearning for pleasure and the lust after vanity. Truth is the correct comprehension of things; it is the permanent and everlasting, the real in all existence, the bliss of righteousness.” – Buddha, The Gospel (Chapter of Enlightenment)
    “By the practice of loving-kindness I have attained liberation of heart” – Buddha

  2. “My ex told me the day that we broke up that God was leading him to do so.”
    So, he’s insane then. Good thing you are well rid of him.
    Find someone not so bat-sheit crazy next time.

  3. A relationship with God, and having a relationship your ex- are 2 different things !!
    Perhaps — God has someone better for you, so learn to distiguise the 2 differences, forgive, and move on…
    Blessings

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