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Have you successfully summoned a succubus?

If you have, can you tell me how you did it. You can tell me in here or you can e-mail me. I am wanting to summons a succubus myself and I have tried the summons ritual a few times without success. I am trying to find someone who can possible help me summons one.
I am serious here.
I NEED to have a nightly relationship with a succubus. This NOT a want. It IS a deeply felt NEED.

8 COMMENTS

  1. Rofl, wtf?
    Yeah, while you’re at it why not just summon up a quadrillion dollars and solve world financial crisis …

  2. You need to sing the song of the succubus over and over until she trusts you enough to come and eat from the palm of your hand. Sing it loudly and clearly. It helps if you are in a public place.
    Repeat after me:
    Ma di robble robble
    Robble robble glory oh glory
    I need to see your beautiful self
    oh, succubus don’t suck out tonight.
    Robble, robble, robble, robble
    Don’t worry if you look silly. It will all be worth it. Besides, succubus like to see guys humiliate themselves.

  3. Have you paused to consider that magic rituals don’t do anything and the succubus doesn’t exist? Trolls are supernatural creatures, but a lot of them turn up on Y!A. Having exhausted the alternative, you might just possibly have to make do with a pesky real woman.
    ,,,Pssst…whatever you do….don’t tell her you fantasise about being raped in your sleep by a demon…maybe break the ice by suggesting a french maid outfit? If she’s keen, wait a while before the mail order hellspawn demon costume lands on the bed whilst she’s tipsy. It may put her off. A cute pair of red devil horns might be the way forward…

  4. Yes I have. Now they won’t leave me alone. Every night it’s sex, sex, sex. Sometimes I just want to watch the game and go to sleep. But no, it’s sex, sex, sex. And then, what’s worse, they want to talk afterward! That’s just the worst.
    Anyway, here’s how I did it. I went to the local graveyard and placed 5 black candles on the ground around me and lit them. Then I stripped completely naked and did the Succubi dance. I learned the Succubi dance from a gypsy I met at the local carnival when I was getting my fortune read, but it cost me a pretty penny. Basically it’s just spinning around a lot and waving your arms with pelvic thrusting, that’s about it.
    So I did that, and that night they started coming to me, and ever since. Now I’m really regretting it. Last week 3 succubi came to me early in the evening and made me watch Grey’s Anatomy with them. I am truly in hell.

  5. sorry, i’m booked up now or i’d send you my email. Error 999 keeps me too busy as of late…and don’t let him lie. he loves grey’s anatomy.

  6. k if your really interested i have this candle holder i bought at a sale. i just thought it looked cool it is shaped like a witch and i use candles during meditation. the holder came with a free candle. i lite the candle and start meditating. I was extremely tired so I meditated for about 10 minutes or so and I blew out the candle. this is funny looking back at it like it made me kinda laugh about 5 minutes after i lay down to sleep i could feel something touching my balls and rubbing me and stuff it was kinda intense. I actually had to move it out of my room for it to stop it was actually really really crazy. I think there is a succubus attached to that candle so if your interested ill sell it too you. this isn’t a scam or anything. but im not sure why you would want to summon a succubus they really are troublesome. luckily i know a lot about them and could make them go away if needed. cause believe me you summon one your gonna be putting up a new page how do i get it to go away. i would not buy this candle again if i went back in time or something but i will sell it if you want.

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