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Aren't religions happy?

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I mean sirsleh, it's like all good.
Christianity: Hey there's hell, but if you accept Jesus Christ, instant heaven! Or in some interpretations, no hell in Bible. Plus God knows all and is merciful, forgiving and understanding.
Islam: Hey there's hell, interpretations vary, but to get into heaven all you have to do is believe in God and Muhammad, works are sort of secondary (ish) and the main one mentioned is charity.
Judaism: Apparently no hell here, alright!
Buddhism: Ah this one is rather bleak, thankfully due to some Dhammanusari and Saddhanusari teachings (dhamma-follower and faith-follower) teachings, salvation is not far away. Plus nibbana was easy as shit to obtain in the Pali Canon, just listening to suttas. Or for some other people, just become a cula-sotapanna really easy. Take refuge in the Buddha (Mahanama Suttas) and instant safety! (for easy streamwinning see Sarakani Sutta), plus MCTB enlightenment is easy as shit to obtain. Alright!
Zen: Enlightenment so easy to obtain, or some progressives don't believe in literal rebirth!
Mahayana: Go to the pureland or chant some Buddha names, done!
Jainism: Forget meditation and virtue, just practice ascetics and tapas, mental state and feelings don't matter! just do the painful physical activity!
Atheism: No life after death, no worry here.
Satanism: Is there a hell here? not sure, well anyways for Laveyan Satanism, just death! or if you're worried about christian hell just accept jesus christ as your savior! but rationalize being a satanist since you think the devil is going to drag you off but God won't care since he's all forgiving.
Progressive Buddhism: Some don't believe in literal rebirth.
Actualism: Life is inherently good AND no life after death.
Daoism: Nothing specific said about after life here, Zhuang Zi appeared to be atheistic, others say soul split into two, one going to heaven to become a deity, the other staying on earth as a ghost.
Chinese Folk Religion: Everyone goes to the chinese afterlife where deities, ghosts and other monsters chill.
See it's all good! What I am missing?
Hinduism: Wash your sins off in that river, done!
Jainism: Navakar mantra!
Hinduism: Venkateswara, or practice devotion a specific God!
Btw I'm just showing how easy it is to avoid bad afterlife or obtain salvation in specific religions, like Mahayana: chant some Buddha names or recite sanghata sutra and apparently enough merit to never fall into the 3 bad rebirths, or Zen, just try to penetrate zen koans.

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In defense of Christianity......
1. the bible never contradicts itself one time.
2. Christianity is based on history, while other religions are based on philosophy.
3. Jesus's main point in his teachings is to be peaceful and to rest assured that they will live in happiness for eternity

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It would appear just about everything.

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Sometimes people get upset with each other and kill each other over the difference in religions.
That is not a lot of fun.
Sometimes one group is in the majority and won't vote as you dictate and this is real major bummer . Many straight people won't vote to let homosexuals marry in the US.

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Hello friend
I will not defend any religion,but I will rather ask you to use your mind to see difference between them.
I can also make up a religion and say, ''You will be really happy If you do what I say'' . And you can also do same and make up another religion where you will claim ''If you become my follower, you will be happier than his follower, I ensure you about this...'' and this goes like this. So who is truthful here? you or me? Or maybe both of us right?
Well... Of course no religion would claim ''you will be sad If you come and follow us...'' because the main purpose of religions is to establish happiness and peace in one's life.(even though Its really controversial, how they affect people's life such negative ways)...
So there is only one question I will ask you here...
Can you believe in all religons ? If your answer yes... Can you explain me, how you can accept Jesus as son of God but also accept him as a messenger of God in Islam ? Or we can raise up this examples...
If your answer no, I can not... Then you come to my point that, there must be only one true religion. So the question here goes like this;
Which religion is really truth ? Which religion is reallly from a super power, from almighty God ?
In order to answer this question, I think you should search a bit more and find out sources of these religions. Who wrote their scriptures? What kinf of proof they can give you, when you ask them ''Whats your proof on your belief? Are you a blind worshipper who never question or you have some really good proof to show me this way of life is really from Creator of everything?''...
I think this will end up somewhere and you will find out what is real religion between those, which can really ensure you happiness 🙂
If you wanna talk more about it, you can just send an email or add me msn. eren-13@hotmail.com
Hope you find it well

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Satanism: Is there a hell here? not sure, well anyways for Laveyan Satanism, just death! or if you're worried about christian hell just accept jesus christ as your savior! but rationalize being a satanist since you think the devil is going to drag you off but God won't care since he's all forgiving.
I'm not going to comment on the grammar...
As far as I can tell, anyone who no longer wants to be Satanist will just leave... Although, it depends on how deep in you are.
I don't believe the Devil is going to drag me off somewhere, I actually pray that I will go to Hell when I pass away.
What makes you think God is all forgiving? I have spoken with both Father Satan and God. Father Satan is by far the more forgiving one.

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