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A memorizer of my past year?

Last year, I was in the middle of my divorce when I changed my job to a company where I met A. A is quite, smart, and sometimes looks so deep, but also always positive. He seemed has bright side of my ex husband, also excluding his negative side. I was obsessed to this type person, so more and more conversations between us in art, music, and other topics, made him so attractive. Meanwhile, other factors pushed me to close to him. First, my personal life’s crisis lower my self-confident which also even made me believe that his understanding and possible love would rescue me eventually. Second, both of us are foreigners in my company, and he understood some difficulties in my work due to cultural and language barriers, sometime, he would give me helpful hints and some spiritual support.
I was sure there was some period he tried to close to me. But I was not certain why he decided to keep a professional distance with me by writing an email to me saying “don’t want to have a relationship
“don’t want to have a relationship out side of job.” Each week, he will go to shopping Malls at least twice, and we usually greeted each other over there. But last time, when he said me that our job was not paid for our conversations, I kept myself away from him for weeks without talking to him at work, or after work.
Only last week, when I encounter him in the hall way in the office, I saw him looked so stressed out. I wished it was not because of me, since his team was under high pressure. Since then, I though over and over, and decided to greet to him again as usual and also chatted with him sometimes. He never as focused on our conversation as ever, but I could feel his relief of the resolved tensions between us.
Now, I realized that his type might not really fit me. Also, there are some differences between our cultural backgrounds making us strangers forever. But at least, in past year, I was seriously tried to understand him and know more about him, even it failed.

3 COMMENTS

  1. Well I’m glad you realised the cultural barriers were too.Also you are freer now and can deal with this openly and honestly

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